Why?

Why am I doing this?  That is the question that I asked myself this morning at 4:25AM, with my neck still hurting (officially a week as of this morning), my legs still a bit sore, and now my right wrist feeling like I sprained it (I have no idea why it hurts).  Why am I getting up well before the sun rises to get in a swim workout?  Why do I leave the house on Saturday mornings at 5:15AM for my long ride?

To be honest, I don't really have an answer right now.  If you had asked me a week ago I had an answer, but this morning at 4:25AM I couldn't come up with one.  My mind was blank and all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed and rest a bit.  Then I thought to myself that one day of missed training can lead to two days.  Then two days can lead to three days and then the spiral begins.  I have suffered through one marathon (back in 2002) due to lack of training or rather having too many excuses not to train.  I can't imagine suffering through an Ironman, that would make an already long day, a long and miserable day.

So I still haven't answered the question, why am I doing this?  Why did I make a commitment back on November 20, 2009 to sign up for Ironman Arizona?  Here is what I have come up with thus far:

• To challenge myself by competing in what I consider to be one of the most difficult races there is...a full Ironman
• To do something I swore four years ago I could never do...swim 2.4 miles
• To stay in good physical shape, and not end up looking like so many over-weight guys my age (or younger)
• To be a good example for my daughters, so they see me as a healthy person who has worked extremely hard to achieve something great
• Because I can
• Because my sports doctor talked me into it last year after I pulled my groin muscle and was getting treatment.

That's about it for now.  I have made a doctor appointment for tomorrow morning to have everything checked.  I just haven't felt right for the past three or four weeks.  Of course I have been self-diagnosing online, so of course I think I know what it is.  I hoping it isn't Lyme Disease, although if it is at least I can start taking medication.  I just want answers!  Ciao!